Three Big Cheers for 20 Years

One bright night in mid-December
A big crowd gathered to remember
20 years — a past un-checkered —
Plus 40 more for the Business Record.
In a room at Prairie Meadows,
Nibbling Chex Mix and Gardetto’s
We raised a toast: “Yay!” “L’chaim!” or
“Give it up for Connie Wimer!”
Our wise founder, a true class act,
Jumped from a plane and smiled, intact!
Her style? Classic. She slays all day;
Her vision guides us, still today.
So, we thought, how ’bout a poem?
That sounds festive! That’ll show ’em
Like “12 Days” odes by Michael Gartner,
Who has a real knack. (This is hard, sir.)
The party deets are kinda blurry;
It all passed in such a hurry.
But it was turnt, like our unveilings;
We shared mags (and saved on mailings).
Forty Under 40s and the Sages,
Sprung to life right from our pages,
One and all, we grabbed the chance
To mix it up and try to dance.
Tiffany Johnson, Kevin Foley,
Debi Durham — holy moly!
Blaire Massa cranked P. Tchaikovsky
For a pas de deux with T. Rychnovsky.
Jason Momoa, fins and all,
Hit the floor and had a ball.
He has rizz, but here’s the kicker:
No one shimmies quite like Wicker.
The two tall Jeffs — Chelesvig, Fleming,
Traded jokes with Dr. Deming.
Molly Phillips! Mollie Cooney!
What a guest list, far from puny!
Suku Radia, Joe Gonzalez,
Far-flung heirs of Henry Wallace!
Sabrina Ahmed! Sophia Ahmad!
Even Ako Abdul-Samad!
“Better together,” said Kristi Knous,
Who shared a Lyft with Tanner Krause.
Scholars Walker Franklin, Martin, Keck
Ditched their homework (what the heck),
And Kelly Baum, the queen of arts,
Sang karaoke — all three parts!
Now, who was louder? Place your bets:
Tina Findlay or the Isiserettes?
Then we froze, all a-quiver:
Simon Estes sang “Old Man River.”
Dana Wingert and Liang Chow
Spun more flips than the laws allow,
Scoring 10s from Mayor Boesen
And a blessing from Bishop Joensen.
Tiffany Tauscheck, Art Slusark
Shot some hoops with Caitlin Clark.
They missed a few, but that’s OK:
We’re still #DSMUSA!
Noshing charcuterie from Wisconsin,
There was Teree Caldwell-Johnson.
Joseph Giunta grabbed his baton
To skewer kebabs — for real? C’mon!
Tej Dhawan and Jenna Knox
Stuffed some stockings with startup stocks.
Jay Byers on X (once Twitter),
Posted pics with Jeriann Ritter,
Who conjured up a bolt of lightning —
Incredible! (But kinda frightening!)
Billy Weathers and the Bookeys
Shared a sundae, straight from Snookie’s.
Paul Rottenberg! Chuck Offenburger
And Mary Riche; bless their merger!
Kevin Reynolds, our first first gent,
Polled the crowd: 95%
Read dsm from back to front;
RSVPs are a treasure hunt.
But wait, hang on, look over there:
It’s Jeremy Parsons from the fair.
He passed out ribbons, red and blue,
For all the guests who knew who’s who.
We skimmed old copies and recalled
When some among us weren’t as bald.
We’ve covered stories through the years:
Concerts, art shows, crafty beers,
Restaurants that have come and gone,
And countless other goings-on.
The Younkers fire, downtown revival,
Farmers markets few can rival,
Winefest, Swine fest, CelebrAsian,
Even a caucus on occasion.
The sculpture park and Seniomsed —
Whoever said Des Moines was dead?
Now, take a breath. If you thought we
Ran outta rhymes, well … there’s Jim Autry!
Luka Garza and Cubby Bear
Played a round of truth or dare.
Bulldog Griff and Grand View’s Viking
Guarded punch from prankster spiking.
The hubbub hushed before a rally,
A second wind, a grand finale!
Giraffes filed in from Blank Park Zoo
To join the noisy hullabaloo.
Ambassadors Quinn and Mary Kramer!
She plugged her ears (can you blame her?)
When (BOOM!) a cannon fired confetti
Along with E.J. Giovannetti.
We all pitched in to sweep the floor
And stuck around just one hour more
For fresh focaccia from George Formaro,
And one last toast to tomorrow.
All in all, it was So. Much. Fun.
So cheers to 20 — and 21!